the spark trips forth
Well, well, here I am again, standing at the brink of yet another momentous event. A new blog. A new excitement. A new flurry of words, photos, and videos (yeah, I'm gonna be making a few, I'm not sure how to post them on here though) to help delineate my confusing fog of a world as brian andrew milburn. A new laptop lies on me, and I'm extremely refreshed after working out, after not showering for two days (the enticing laziness of Rochesterian summer is mad awesome).
It's Monday, two days before the training for SVP begins. Today I've gotta make a video, a deafied (is that a verb?) version of the Spider-Pig segment from the new Simpsons movie. I'm working with a few others to convert it into a more-deaf-friendly showing, involving a cat rather than a pig. Hopefully it'll engender some new insights. It'll be the first time that I'll be working with video - after a year of struggling with the Student Communication Center (how shameful)...
My writing skills have deteriorated, and my vocabulary... geez, I'm so ashamed. The onslaught of German and ASL the past half-year has done a wonderfully attritional job on my hefty Englischwaffe. But! This blog and my MacBook, exposing me to more chances of writing and tools for my writing, will counterbalance that horrific wear-down. I should be okay, I guess, and I did write a significant amount this past school year (as a cathartic self-therapeutic tool, different from creative and exploratory writing).
I found an awesome program to use on my Macbook - a free one at that - Journler. It lets me write all I want, and tag/categorize them all I want, but unfortunately, I can't update my blogger.com blog from it. That's the only downfall.
And yet again, I've gotta say that I hate my blurry mind, my constantly overwhelmed mind, my always-on-the-move mind, my “OH CRAP I CANT KEEP TRACK OF THAT!!!!!!!!” mindset... something's telling me that I'll be depriving this journal, but something else tells me otherwise. Why? Because of this school year, how vastly different it'll be from the last two years. Last year was interesting and filled with evolution - understanding my own deaf identity, grappling with the consequences of my EYF job, dating Sarah Vitberg, handling my roommates... two years ago it was struggling to insert myself back into the RIT world, meeting new friends, dating a few girls, deepening my relationship with Adam Munder... two years have overran me in a flash.
It feels weird to have a computer again, especially to have a Mac after so long of using a PC. I didn't view my iBook in a nice way - it was obnoxiously slow and its keyboard was vastly annoying to use, but it served a good, vital function. After losing the laptop and then the PC, my world was shattered - that combination then helped things become worse for me as a writer.
That, with the realization that I'm starting to like myself as a deaf person growing from the spark ignited by Mike Barrett and Sarah Vitberg and Terry Mackin this past school year... along with my experience in Germany, and my EYF experience... all of that is swirling through me and pushing out something rather new. I'm still the bitter, cynical soul, but there's a significant change: I love myself. I remember one line I had in my facebook profile this past school year - continuously visualizing myself standing at the edge of a pit and thereupon shooting myself invariably in the head. Now, what do I do with my memoir? It's an interesting one, and I'd like to expand upon it... elaborate and articulate further, but I wonder how my new world, my new understanding of things has changed it all.... would my tone be irrevocably different? Would I be able to return to the same mindset, the same voice, the same undying charismatic screech that I had locked in my throat the past twenty-two years?
Well, it's time for me to visit CompUSA. More wishing, more convincing, more buying.
It's Monday, two days before the training for SVP begins. Today I've gotta make a video, a deafied (is that a verb?) version of the Spider-Pig segment from the new Simpsons movie. I'm working with a few others to convert it into a more-deaf-friendly showing, involving a cat rather than a pig. Hopefully it'll engender some new insights. It'll be the first time that I'll be working with video - after a year of struggling with the Student Communication Center (how shameful)...
My writing skills have deteriorated, and my vocabulary... geez, I'm so ashamed. The onslaught of German and ASL the past half-year has done a wonderfully attritional job on my hefty Englischwaffe. But! This blog and my MacBook, exposing me to more chances of writing and tools for my writing, will counterbalance that horrific wear-down. I should be okay, I guess, and I did write a significant amount this past school year (as a cathartic self-therapeutic tool, different from creative and exploratory writing).
I found an awesome program to use on my Macbook - a free one at that - Journler. It lets me write all I want, and tag/categorize them all I want, but unfortunately, I can't update my blogger.com blog from it. That's the only downfall.
And yet again, I've gotta say that I hate my blurry mind, my constantly overwhelmed mind, my always-on-the-move mind, my “OH CRAP I CANT KEEP TRACK OF THAT!!!!!!!!” mindset... something's telling me that I'll be depriving this journal, but something else tells me otherwise. Why? Because of this school year, how vastly different it'll be from the last two years. Last year was interesting and filled with evolution - understanding my own deaf identity, grappling with the consequences of my EYF job, dating Sarah Vitberg, handling my roommates... two years ago it was struggling to insert myself back into the RIT world, meeting new friends, dating a few girls, deepening my relationship with Adam Munder... two years have overran me in a flash.
It feels weird to have a computer again, especially to have a Mac after so long of using a PC. I didn't view my iBook in a nice way - it was obnoxiously slow and its keyboard was vastly annoying to use, but it served a good, vital function. After losing the laptop and then the PC, my world was shattered - that combination then helped things become worse for me as a writer.
That, with the realization that I'm starting to like myself as a deaf person growing from the spark ignited by Mike Barrett and Sarah Vitberg and Terry Mackin this past school year... along with my experience in Germany, and my EYF experience... all of that is swirling through me and pushing out something rather new. I'm still the bitter, cynical soul, but there's a significant change: I love myself. I remember one line I had in my facebook profile this past school year - continuously visualizing myself standing at the edge of a pit and thereupon shooting myself invariably in the head. Now, what do I do with my memoir? It's an interesting one, and I'd like to expand upon it... elaborate and articulate further, but I wonder how my new world, my new understanding of things has changed it all.... would my tone be irrevocably different? Would I be able to return to the same mindset, the same voice, the same undying charismatic screech that I had locked in my throat the past twenty-two years?
Well, it's time for me to visit CompUSA. More wishing, more convincing, more buying.
posted by articulated milburnism at
3:23 PM
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